My 2024 in Review
365 days later, it’s time to close the curtains on another year (technically 366, but you know what I meant). I’ll admit that I’m both a skeptic and a critic of basing so much on the arbitrary “full rotation around the sun,” and a willing participant in the practice; I mean, I’m writing this post reviewing the year, aren’t I? I’d say, on average, the year was a good one with ups and downs, which I guess is the most generic and obvious descriptor of a year, but that doesn’t make it less true.
Career Transition
At the beginning of the year, I started and completed a “career transition,” shedding my last report and stepping away from being an Engineering Manager by role. It wouldn’t be until August for my title to catch up. By then, I was officially a ✨Software Architect✨. This change was exciting and uncomfortable in many ways, but most importantly, the choice was mine. It wasn’t made for me or heavily suggested—it was simply mine if I wanted it. Other than that, though, work was work. I was involved in many projects, ranging from trying to modernize our Java stack to preparing for recent FCC rulings that take effect in the new year. I learned a lot, had fun along the way, and despite some disappointments—from modernization projects not being received well to compensation frustrations—it was all worth it. During the last all-hands meeting of the year, I was awarded what we call the Big Ass Trophy for Agility, Performance, and Customer Empathy, which felt great (and was perfectly timed, as I hadn’t exactly been feeling seen or recognized at work up until this point). But enough deflecting from my personal life through work.
Personal Life
Personally, the year has been a whirlwind of self-discovery. I focused on creating new connections, growing existing ones, and overall just trying to slow things down and enjoy life. I briefly re-entered the dating scene, which I had hopes would work out but ultimately wasn’t meant to be. That sucked at first, due to feeling lonely and just wanting to make some sort of deep connection with another person, but it felt better with time. Maybe 2025 will be the year for me in this regard, but even if it isn’t, that’s okay. The more I stress about it, the less likely it’ll happen, so why stress? I got to spend even more time volunteering my time, talent, and treasure to my alma mater, St. Edward’s University, through many avenues. Whether in my role as the Alumni Association President, as a member of the advisory board for the School of Natural Sciences (where STEM rolls up on campus), or by visiting to speak with students or participate in symposiums, my contributions felt meaningful. My time as alumni president is up, and while I hope I win re-election, even if I don’t, I’ll still be involved in both old and new exciting ways.
Health Journey
Health-wise, I lost a bunch of weight this year. Some of it was intentional. Some of it just kind of happened—probably due to starting Vyvanse and it nuking my appetite. Either way, the Vyvanse was very much needed to make things suck less from ADD, and after putting on 50 lbs during the pandemic, I needed to lose those 20 lbs. Did I mention the Vyvanse? Holy shit. From spending 31 years of my life just raw-dogging my ADD to actually being medicated, it was both a relief and a weight off my shoulders. It wasn’t immediate, but over time, this change finally led to me “fixing” or establishing a better sleep schedule, which in turn helped my mental health even further than therapy alone was doing.
Autism Diagnosis
Last year, I was tested (thanks, Cigna, for barely covering any of the $3k+ in costs) for autism. Though not a shock to my family and closest friends, the results confirmed what many suspected. Getting that confirmation started a process that carried into this year. It's a journey that will likely continue for years: coming to terms with this knowledge and learning more about myself. Parsing years of trauma through a new lens and understanding was healing, bringing a sense of closure to some wounds while also unearthing difficult memories. The pain often came from confronting moments I had buried or reframing experiences through this new perspective, but each step felt like progress towards a fuller understanding of myself. I no longer felt that I was doing something wrong, or that I was wrong. As if these struggles were due to some moral failing within myself, when in reality, they stemmed from being different. However, this does have a happy ending. It may have taken most of the year, but around October or November, I finally felt comfortable in my own skin, as I truly was. My 32 years of masking started to end. Pieces of it will remain, Phantom of the Opera-style, but now it’ll be for things like work and other professional settings. Embracing my authentic self has been liberating, and while masking will still play a role in certain spaces, it no longer defines my identity. Because lets be real, without some sort of filter, I’m going to get myself in trouble quickly.
Looking Ahead
And now we’re at the end. It’s the last day of 2024, and I have no idea what 2025 will have in store for me. Maybe 2025 will be the year I finally start putting effort into writing blog posts like I wanted to this year. I mean, I’ve got a variety of post ideas stored away in Reflect, such as:
- What is personal responsibility, and who defines it?
- Something about finally figuring out why I don’t like Microsoft Teams
- My personal journey through software architecture/architecting
- Thoughts on LLMs or "AI"
- At work, I’m "Mr. AI," which is weird because of how much of a skeptic I am about LLMs. But I’ll save that for my future writings.
Will these ever turn into blog posts? Maybe, but if they don’t, I know I won’t be punishing myself for not doing it. I have a lot of anxieties and stress about the new year, and most of them are centered around Trump’s re-election and what that means for his and his supporters’ continued attacks against communities I love, cherish, and identify with. But despite all of that, I am hopeful. And with a little bit of luck, and a whole lot of elbow grease and putting in the work, I think everything will work out.
Conclusion
I’m terrible at writing conclusions or ending things, so this is it, the true end. Happy New Year to everyone, and I’ll see you next year.